Let it be known that classes are finally done!! I handed in my last paper this morning and sold my book back to the mafioso bookstore. Being the bookworm that I am, that felt a little like blasphemy, but hey, that's darned decent yarn money! I feel so liberated. Speaking of liberation (seamless segue, I know) brings me to clarion cry #1. . .Ghetto knitters of the world unite!! Give me your socioeconomically disadvantaged, your poor, your huddled masses with Susan Bates aluminum needles yearning to be free! My fellow ghetto knitter girl, Olga, designed this fab button and came up with the idea to do a "You know you 're a ghetto knitter when..." post, inviting all you other ghetto knitters out there to rally with us by posting your credentials in comments or posts of your own. Olga's already come clean, loud and proud- check out her impressive ghetto CV! For the benefit of ghetto knitters everywhere, I'm officially coming out of the closet now. Hopefully this won't be as traumatic as admitting that I'm a Clay fan. Or admitting to being a Josh Groban fan. Apparently, I've got some weird thing for skinny, dorky good boys. Again, I blame my mom for making me unnaturally obsessed with Barry Manilow in kindergarten. Oh, the flashbacks and therapy!! Subsequent, my ghetto knitter resume in full:
You know you're a ghetto knitter when...
1) You go to Borders on a mission to find a copy of the latest IK. . .not to purchase (you can only afford that off of Ebay a season later when the price drops by half), but to find the latest Knit Picks free shipping code, which you furiously scribble on the back of your hand and milk for all it's worth till next season.
2) You wonder if trusty, loyal Knit Picks is turning Benedict Arnold on you, selling the likes of Ambrosia and Panache at freaking $6.99 a ball. "What's next, angora?" you mutter to yourself in disgust.
3) Your "knitting library" and the public library are one and the same.
4) The librarian recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call to claim your knitting library for another three weeks.
5) You're reduced to stealing gnarled hair elastics off your daughter's stinky head because you refuse to pay for stitch markers.
6) You can passionately articulate the subtle nuance differences between Red Heart, Caron and Bernat acrylic.
7) That said, you hoard your Caron Simply Soft for your "good projects" only.
8) You unabashedly ask your LYS owner for $2 parking validation after recklessly blowing 5 bucks on an impulse purchase of Plymouth Encore.
Give it up for Ghetto Knitters, the true blue collar bones of the craft! Take a button and spread the love. Many thanks to Olga for conceiving and lending her passionate voice to the new Ghetto Renaissance Movement!
Speaking of Renaissance Movements (note seamless segue #2), brings me to clarion cry #2. Throwers unite and stand proud! Pickers may revel in all the glory, but it's time for English knitters to throw their way to bursitis and the forefront! Check out Laura's awesome buttons and stand tall!
And finally, clarion call #3: Lelah is DONE!! And just in time for Holiday Countdown KAL day tomorrow. Sewing the casing for the elastic wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. Please excuse the glaring white unmentionables. Compared to the prospect of looking at a top-commando pic, I think the white bra is quite the acceptable alternative. The second shot is truer to the actual color (of Lelah, not the undergarment!), which is a deep red; the ribbon is actually a creme color. I thought about going with a black ribbon, but decided against it, thinking it might look a little too ooh-la-la. This is for my baby sis, after all. I'm actually pretty pleased with the way this turned out, especially post-blocking (on garbage bags and old towels with pushpins, ghetto-style, of course!). As I mentioned in my last post, this Lelah's way too tight for me (hence my weird getting-squeezed-like a -tube-of-toothpaste posture), but that'll be a good thing for The Mercenary, who is taller, thinner, much younger and much more fit than I am. Having just re-read that last sentence, I've since decided that I hate her. I'm considering adding a v-strap halter, so if anyone has any ideas on how to accomplish that other than Icord, I'd appreciate any advice.
Lastly, having been duly inspired, I leave you with my latest attempt at being a good, crafty mom. I based these advent calendars on a cookie ribbon that my aunt made for me when I was born. She has since passed away, but using the cookie ribbon she made me year after year is one of my most cherished holiday memories. Now, if Stinky can just manage to leave the cookies and Honey Boro tied to the ribbon long enough to become a memory, I'm hoping the tradition will become a cherished one for she and Bossy, too!